Lyrics
THE SNOOCH:
Richie, baby,
I'm reality show superstar The Snooch
And these are our quad mates
Fashion designer Gizmo Guccini and music festival producer Burt Bonnaroo
BURT:
Let me get your bags
GIZMO:
Welcome home
Membro del congresso
THE SNOOCH:
Fear not, Prisoner newb
The needy and poor won't bother you anymore
Fret not, inmate 202
These hollowed halls house elite criminals
On the outside, I was a TV star
(GIZMO: Then the IRS checked Myanmar)
I had 26 accounts offshore
Maybe a few million took a detour
Now my branding deals are "Force Majeure"
Oh well, now I'm in jail
(GIZMO: Bellissimo)
There's a tiki bar
(GIZMO: It's awesome)
And I make a mean kona cocktail
Oh boy, now I'm in jail
(GIZMO: Do I taste passion fruit?)
I'm still a big star
And I still eat caviar
BURT:
I ran a festival that scammed a few
(GIZMO: I bribed a coach at a Big U)
Apparently fraudulence will get you time
(GIZMO: And loving your children is a crime)
Now I can't afford to buy celebrity friends
(GIZMO: My kids go to city college in a Benz)
The goal is to keep our holes protected
ALL:
Thank god we got the judge elected
This is where you go when you're well connected
Oh boy, now we're in jail
So light a cigar
It's basically a mixer for Yale
Oh boy, welcome to jail
Write a memoir
And sell it
The accommodations have been perfected
This is what you get when you're well connected
RICHARD:
Okay, I guess this is jail
A little bizarre
It feels like black-tie for blackmail
I guess this is jail
(bell rings)
There's a trolley car
Amazing
This is much better than expected
This is what you get when you're well connected
THE SNOOCH:
Kona cocktail?
RICHARD:
Uh, sure
(sips)
Outstanding